Friday, November 25, 2011

SHOWDOWN


I think most people would agree: Preachers are the modern day version of Gunslingers.

We’re tough.  We’re fearless.  We’re awesome. We are the Wyatt Earp’s of our time. 

Well, I’M Wyatt Earp, and other preachers are more like my posse.  My Deputies.  I’m the MAIN gunslinger, is what I’m sayin’.  The leader.  The best one.  The fast draw.

I’m Wyatt Earp, TD Jakes is Doc Holiday and Joel Olsteen is the grocery store clerk who never joins the posse and gets robbed all the time and gets hits on the head with the butt of a gun.  Anyhow...


Just look at the similarities between a Gunslinger of the Old West and a modern day Preacher like me:  the Gunslinger has a horse, I have a pulpit.  The Gunslinger has at least two guns and a knife with him wherever he goes; I always have my Preachin’/Wavin’ Around Bible, my Back-up Study Bible and either a Greek Lexicon, or my “Big Book of Dog Illustrations” book with me.

The Gunslinger is always stylishly dressed; NObody wears a 3-piece corduroy suit like I do.

The Gunslinger comes to town to rid it of evil and menace; the Preacher comes to church ready to baptize or disfellowship whoever needs it and whichever clears out the saloon faster.

The Gunslinger calls for a posse; the Preacher puts together the potluck steering committee.

The Gunslinger is fearless in the face of insurmountable odds, ultimately facing down and defeating the main bad guy in the middle of main street in a final showdown; the Preacher is calm when called to an Emergency Grumpy Elder’s Meeting about last Sunday’s sermon, and ultimately faces down and defeats the lead Grumpy Elder in a one on one Bible Bowl Extravaganza.

Well, that last one doesn’t always work out that way.  In truth, Grumpy Elders are known for killing preachers off without breakin’ a sweat.

OK - Gunslingers and Preachers was a bad example.

How ‘bout this one:  have you ever noticed how much Preachers Zoo Keepers have in common?

As together we stand and sing.

BP