Monday, June 20, 2011

THE CRAFTY PREACHER

Emergency Preacher Crafts
Let's face it.  Preachers just don't do crafts like they used to.

Jesus was a woodworker.  
Paul made tents.  Peter mended nets.
Joseph's dad liked to tie-dye coats of many colors.

Nowadays, Preachers golf.  Or worse yet, bowl.  I know one Preacher in Omaha who is on a paintball team.  He isn't that good.  I know he isn't any good because whenever he  preaches he has a slight orange glow around his forehead and cheeks.  He's pretty bruised up too.  He may wanna try something else.  Like maybe a nice, safe Turner Classic Movies Marathon.

It's good for Preachers who spend most of their time reading and worrying and baptizing, to do something with their hands on occasion.  Helps keep the calluses up.  There's nothing worse than shakin' hands with a Preacher after church and getting the feeling that he just came from getting a manicure.  

For me, the craft of champions is probably Leathercraft.  

I like it because there's leather involved - which makes it easy to pretend like I'm Jesse James making a saddle in the Old West for a big, upcoming train robbery.  Or maybe a cave man makin' a hat.  Or a guy in prison makin' a billfold.  

Also, with Leathercraft, I can usually bang my thumb at least twice, which is always a good manly look,  as well as find a way to cut myself several times.  In short, it can tear up my hands pretty quickly, which with my tight preaching schedule is a must.

Also very few people (let alone Preachers) even DO Leathercraft anymore.  I love to see the look of surprise (some would misinterpret it as disgust) when I give someone a belt I made with their name and some ladybugs pounded into it.  I make 'em put it on right away and model it. That just doesn't happen anymore.

Most importantly Leathercraft provides me with some down time as well as an opportunity for sermon illustrations.  Some of the sermon illustrations and ideas I have had just this week as a result of working in leather include:

Christians: Tough as Leather, Cute as Butterflies.

Put On The Belt Of Righteousness And Blue Birds.

It's Hard To Sin When you're Name And Phone Number Is On Your Belt.

So come on, Preachers.  Get your hands a little dirty.  Tear up a table top.  Singe the ends of your fingers.  The whole golf thing is SO...Pre-Power Point. 

Dare To Be A Crafter!

As together we stand and sing.

BP